[Helpers] !!!@&*^%#!&$#!!!!!

[Mystress Angelique Serpent]

At 12:28 AM 03/08/2006, you wrote:

>Yikes!
>
>That probably explains why there has been no activity, or any responses to 
>my updates on the helpers list...

   Eh, that actually has more to do with my ADD attention span.  I got 
those emails but have not had time or attention to be able to deal, aside 
from downloading them to my hard drive.  If you read the archives you will 
notice I tend to work on different projects in spurts and phases... until 
my attention for it runs out, or other concerns distract me.

   While doing the minimal web work I have been the past while, I kept 
finding things that needed repair and had to be very mindful not to do 
it  all right then.  Hyperfocus is a mixed blessing, I have to be careful 
where I aim it because it can really pull me off track.

    The reason why Hillary does most of the day to day updates on K-gateway 
is if I get started tweaking something I might get too interested and three 
weeks later I've redone the whole site and everything else I had to do fell 
by the wayside.  Got man'ana-ed.

   It is a gift and a disability... requires some management, and the 
management means not always being able to respond to posts promptly. If my 
focus is elsewhere I cannot always just switch tracks to give something 
else my full attention.

   I am occupied with a bunch of other stuff at present, and trying to 
enjoy summer while it lasts.  I generally prefer to do web work in Winter 
when it is cold and rainy but often end up doing stuff in summer 
anyhow.  Having to move my account in the middle of summer, two years in a 
row sucks buffalo farts.  I had not even gotten everything repaired from 
the last move,... like the search engines for the Klist and tea room 
archives. It all feels quite hopeless at the moment because I am 
overwhelmed. When I have too many things that need doing, pulling at me I 
get stressed and  cannot do anything... I'm about at that point now.  Maybe 
writing it out will be a release...

   I have been trying to stop loathing the web migration procedure so that 
it will be smooth. Last month I had a funny thought of moving anyway, 
perhaps if I move voluntarily every year things won't get so catastrophic.

  Richard presented me with a new computer when he was here... a fast one 
that can do video editing!   I have been going through the old one, moving 
stuff, archiving and deleting. Going through about 90 g of files going back 
to 1996... what a mess.

    I've also been doing some other maintenance type stuff, trying to 
organize my many mailboxes so the spam and spam bounces get deleted 
automatically without any genuine mail going missing.  .. and that means 
tracking down every address I use and making a forwarder for it so the 
catchalls become spam bins. I deleted thousands of spams from my webmail 
the other day.

    I also discovered some spam leaks... email addresses not properly spam 
proofed on web pages.  Some list member addresses too... I felt terrible 
for having overlooked that.

   The worst problem with mail going missing was recently getting emails 
like this:

 >It has been over a month since I have sent payment. I don't know if it
 >is AOL email or some other reason that I can't establish communication
 >with you. I am trying a different email service. Any day is fine Late
 >afternoon or evening your time is good. Send a date,time and number
 >and I will send another email to confirm.

   ouch. Very bad. Horrifying. So I have been busy with damage control.

   In other news.. my main housekeeper has been off for the past month, and 
I am being buried in my own clutter. I have not even completely unpacked my 
suitcase from Europe yet. druid is way busy, his three weeks sailing 
vacation got cut down to one and he is having to work overtime. I have been 
giving him extra TLC... he gets seasonal affective disorder, the man really 
needs his "green time"  and I have been letting him go fishing instead of 
asking him to help with house things.

   We came home from sailing to discover the kitchen had become a fruit fly 
farm... and they were living in the garbage disposal, and even pouring 
bleach and hot water down it has not helped.

   druid and I have both been too busy to properly put everything away 
after sailing... which enhanced the fruit fly farm well beyond my 
tolerance.  Today while attacking the situation by setting out a glass of 
sherry for them then sucking them up with a vacuum cleaner, I accidentally 
knocked a plastic jug of pace picante sauce off the counter and it 
exploded. The lid popped off ..  I think it must have been fermenting, that 
is the only way it could have erupted with such velocity. There was/is 
tomato sauce and onion bits spattered 360 degrees in my white kitchen from 
floor to ceiling. Fruit flies love salsa.

  Camel broke, I could not deal. I walked away from the mess, took off my 
salsa spattered clothes in the laundry room and had a time-out.

    druid dealt with the worst of it, after we got back from the chiro but 
I am still going to be spending my evening wiping salsa stains.

   On the list of things for august is a number of large house projects, 
like rebuilding a set of stone and cement steps going down into my backyard 
that had been neglected for 5 years before we moved in.  I weeded them and 
pressure washed them two summers ago... and they collapsed. The weeds and 
dirt had been holding them together.  I have to dig out the old steps, and 
all the dirt and weeds to make a steep vertical trench to fill with the 
several tons of gravel waiting in  a pile out front, then sculpt new steps 
out of stone and cement.

    Heavy work, great for building muscle and bone density but hazardous 
too. Lose my balance on the slope while carrying 50lbs of stone... ?  Slow 
and steady.

    I always come home from sailing with an interesting collection of 
bruises and injuries gained by losing balance inside a sailboat on rough 
seas.  Tonight druid commented on a black and yellow smudge at my temple. I 
hit my head on things on three separate occasions, but that one was from 
when he accidentally clocked me in the head with an electric boat engine. 
ow.

>  I'll store all of that info off-line until everything is working 
> again.  Sorry to hear about the mess. :( I know it's not the first time.

   I've temporarily deleted the fscnew folder, after backing it up on my 
hard drive. Seems part of the reason for cpanel migration not working well 
in the past (and deleting or messing my lists)  may have been that it 
chokes on accounts that are more than 2g so I have been deleting 
non-essentials that can be restored later in hopes that it will ease the 
transition.

    I have not examined the samples you sent. I hate watching myself, and I 
am afraid of putting my hyper self-critical energy into the Shakti matrix 
of the work, which could happen if I try to force myself.

   I will examine them when it feels right, when I am inspired,  in a frame 
of mind to enhance the message with love.  I trust your judgment, and for 
the time being, I really would much rather other helpers review the stuff 
and give me feedback.

    I'm sorry the lag is causing such a problem. I have not noticed it in 
the tape when recording and I don't know where it came from.

   I probably won't get back to editing the FST lessons until Sept. I have 
done the first 40, and the word docs were uploaded to fscnew before I left 
for Europe.  I know some of those 40 are still missing bits and pieces, 
homework assignments etc.

    I don't know how far Sachiko got with putting them into the forms.  I 
think we got sidetracked with fonts and then I left for Europe. I'll try to 
respond to May's emails in a week or two but you might not hear much from 
me until Sept. Most of the projects helpers are working on are not 
dependent on my editing timeline so no worries. Keep at it please.

   I'm off to a pagan convention this weekend, Friday to Monday. I'll be 
doing a third eye & discernment workshop, volunteer.  The new hosting 
account is set up. I'm going to put in the request to move servers when I 
get back.
    I hope to have a relaxing time because I am feeling kind of worn out 
and beat up. Still have to pack... this particular convention is fun but 
many times I have been ill afterwards. The past few years it is just 
projectile puking on the way home.  Today I have found myself wondering why 
I am going... but I have made commitments and it is too late to back out now.

    One thing that astonished me about the pix of my tour of Europe was how 
much younger I look in the photos where you were showing me castles and 
Stockholm. I think it was the beneficial effect of both of you snacking on 
me. Thanks so much! A photo of me today would probably look like something 
the cat dragged in... if you could help I'd surely appreciate it!

    Gotta go... thanks everybody for sticking with me.

>Namaste!
>Gustaf
>
>-----Ursprungligt meddelande-----
>Från: helpers-bounces at fire-serpent.org 
>[mailto:helpers-bounces at fire-serpent.org] För Mystress Angelique Serpent
>Skickat: den 3 augusti 2006 00:34
>Till: Kundalist at kundalini-gateway.org
>Kopia: Helpers at fire-serpent.org; Stephen Kowalchuk; Richard Burnett
>Ämne: [Helpers] !!!@&*^%#!&$#!!!!!
>
>
>     My webhosts 30 minute support guarantee went out the window this week..
>so did their 99.9% uptime guarantee, July was more like 94%. The first post
>in the archives this month is a test post from the provider's tech... the
>fact that it happened on Tuesday and my support request was sent in the wee
>hours of Sunday... arg.
>
>    I've spent the past 2 days shopping for a new host.
>
>     Ya know, fire-serpent.com has been moved to another server in whole or
>part every year since it opened, and the K-list has gone down and been
>revived more times than I care to count.  It has been plagued with various
>problems since it was first opened 10 years ago.  The lighthouse spell is
>supposed to protect the server from the Shakti energy...
>
>     !!!@&*^%#!&$#!!!!!
>
>      I'm going out of town this weekend, Friday to Monday afternoon so
>whether things get moved tomorrow or next week is anybody's
>guess.  Unfortunately only about 10% of members will get this message... sigh.
>
>    I've chosen a Canadian host this time... enough with this cross border
>shopping!
>http://www.monsterhosting.ca/
>
>
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